My child was not born with autism.
Which one has autism? In this picture, the answer is neither!
Gavin was forced into this world a couple weeks early because he was trying to kill me.
I was in the Army at the time and it was bad enough that I was in the Medical Corp working at a hospital (PT?? What’s PT?) –but being knocked up in the Army means you don’t have to fall out for PT (what little we did) NOR do you have to participate in the semi-annual weigh-in’s (woo hoo!!). Before Pregnancy I worked 3 to 11 p.m. and would go jogging around the golf course at night after work –usually around midnight. (I would be warned how unsafe that was by the MP’s as Ft Polk was home to the 2nd ACR –Armored Calvary officially, but to the rest of us it was short for “All Criminal Regimen” 
And the rumor was they were full of rapists! –To which I would reply, “Eh, it makes me run faster!” )
Well, with permission to get fat and lazy I jumped right in! A mini-vacation! I quit exercising (running is for suckers!) and began a diet of BK for lunch and Sonic’s cheddar peppers for dinner (P.S. I hated hot peppers up to that point, this craving was Gavin’s doing, and to this day he and I both enjoy hot peppers on regular occasion!). –I also would eat a bag of Oreo’s often, along with a huge glass of chocolate milk (and I hate milk!!) I went from being a runner with little body fat to Shamu the Whale, in very little time. My incredibly hot doctor (Yes, I still remember your name Cpt Paul Casner, MD) would gently bitch at me about my weight at every visit. Shut up, Doc! I’m on vacation!!
Some where during this pregnancy I met my friend Misty, we were in the same boat –single moms in the Army! She was from Louisiana and girl knew how to coax me out for dinner… frying up some sort of seafood in a huge vat of oil. We hung out A LOT, attached at the hip… I ate a LOT of fish (Hello, Mercury!). Misty and I lived very similar lives during our pregnancies and during the first 9 months of the boys lives. We were together all the time, we ate the same things, went to the same places, lived on the same street. Our babies saw the same doctors. They probably even got vaccines from the same lots. The external environment that we lived in was shared between us.
Near the end, my incredibly poor diet (90%) and my genetic fuckedupness (10%) led to preeclampsia. My high blood pressure meant that I needed to have the baby soon else my head would explode. Literally. So at 37.5 weeks along (not premature by medical standards, but certainly unnaturally early) I was induced.
I haven’t told this story to many people –yet, I am about to put it here for all to read. When he was handed to me the first time I heard a voice in my head say, “My name is Gavin and there is something wrong with me.” –At that point I hadn’t decided on a name yet. So my inner voice decided right then and there –but it also told me there was something wrong with my child. No, he wasn’t Autistic then… but I see now that he was genetically susceptible to damage from toxins and vaccines, more than most babies are –more than his baby BFF who you see in the above picture next to him. Misty’s baby would not get autism. Good genes!
I worked at that hospital. I knew all the doctors. I asked each and every one of them to check him out. “There is something wrong with him, figure it out!” They would all give him a mini-baby physical and say, “Jenny, he is fine!! He is more than fine. He is a bright, alert, beautiful baby boy! Stop worrying!!” OK… maybe they are right. I am tired… I am hearing voices. I need to sleep…
The first night was peachy! I fed him… they took him away… I slept all night for the first time in months.
The next morning they brought him to me… the morning went well.
At some point hot-male-nurse came in and handed me a consent form for a Hep B vaccine. I can still remember parts of the conversation… And I still wish I could go back in time and throat punch that ignorant bitch who held the pen and said, “Are there really parents who don’t sign this?” and “That is just stupid, get it done!” I signed. He got his injection and within hours his problems began.
He started throwing up everything he ate. (Later when Misty had her baby, this was a joke with us. She said, “And guess what?? He wore THE SAME shirt the whole time he was here!!” –Gavin had his clothes changed more times than I could count). They lavaged his stomach twice, hoping that would help. Nope. –This was the source of his food allergy to diary.
That first night he cried and cried. and cried. The next day… crying. The second night… crying. and crying.
In hindsight I realize this was from brain swelling, an encephalitis type reaction to the Hep B vaccine. Within days he developed eczema all over his body. I jokingly called him “My little “V” baby” –you remember V, the alien TV show. He was scaly like an alien! HA HA! HILARIOUS! *eye roll* ignorant dumb ass!
Scaly V baby flips me off while thinking, "I'm allergic to this milk, asshats!"
He was never 100% after that. He was a very sickly baby.
You all know the story –all our kids have the same story. Chronic health problems. Chronic ear infections, chronic anti-biotic abuse… Fevers that reach 106 (normally right after a round of vaccines, and fevers that high only mean 1 of 2 things… heat stroke or poisoning. My baby was poisoned.) He was sick. sick sick. But he still wasn’t Autistic yet. He was still there.
I often describe Gavin’s health and experience with vaccines as a boxing match! With each round of vaccines he would get knocked to the mat. He’d lie there a while… dazed, hurt, miserable… but that plastic little mighty brain of his would start to heal. It would do what it could to find new pathways, to right the wrongs… He WOULD GET UP, swinging!!!
With each round of shots he would have horrible reactions. The fevers… the moaning out in pain and misery…
But he’d come back.. a little… UNTIL. Until February 1998. He was 15 months old. He got his MMR and DTP that day.
That was the final round of the boxing match.
That was the KO moment.
His last word was “Fishies!” He said it as he tapped on the fish tank in the waiting room at the doctors before he went back for his shots. [And I supposed it's "just a coincidence" that I am NOT the ONLY autism mom with THAT EXACT story, Karen Seroussi writes the same thing in her book, "Unraveling the Mystery of Autism and PDD"] I wouldn’t hear a word out of his mouth again for 4 more years. –and even though we do get words and the occasional random novel sentence, he still has the expressive verbal language of a two year old.
Gavin is the baby on the left in that photo. He is not autistic in that photo at 6 months of age.
Neither is this Gavin, this picture of him was taken shortly before that KO at 15 months:
NOT Autistic... yet! In a few days he would get his MMR and Mercury laden DTP.
This is after:
Cluelessly painting my nails...
That is not a baby simply resting… This became his 24/7 look for a long time… eyes with the thousand-yard stare, thumb in mouth… he didn’t suck it, he hooked his thumb behind his front teeth and put pressure on a pressure point there to soothe himself!
Hello??? Anybody in there??
Lots of pics in that pose. Gone Baby, Gone!
Gavin got all his shots on time, and actually, his two month shots were very early. Not only did I ask to do them right before he turned 6 weeks old (it was a timing thing with my medical leave, being away from the Army hospital, etc.) BUT remember, he was born at 37.5 weeks. Adjusted for age, he got a Hep B, Hib, DTP and OPV, at 3.5 weeks of “age”
His eczema went away when I discovered the GFCF diet.
We did biomed such as diet, MB12, chelation and supplements. He got better. This was his work in school, he stayed in a regular class up through second grade… and THEN…
A lovely drawing, with color! Gavin is a great artist, but now he rarely draws and will only use pen for anime type drawings. He doesn't take direction, or prompts.
And he would journal with minimal prompting, this went away... a second regression happened.
Yep. A second regression right before he turned 10. Residual vaccine damage + start of puberty = Seizures.
NOT BORN THIS WAY.
My family has a deep and wild history of auto-immune dysfunction in the generations above me. My generation has it’s issues. Gavin’s generation –just on one side of my family, has two autism Dx’s and more. Then there is another cousin on another side with autism and various other issues. There is also a first cousin on his dad’s side with issues.
When there are metabolic and auto-immune issues in your family –your child is a sitting duck for vaccine damage.
Gavin and I share two conditions. Juvenile Myoclonic Epilepsy AND Chiari Malformation (common in autism, and I believe it to be a vaccine reaction, brain swelling). I had some issues growing up… some OCD, some sensory issues that persist. (I GET Gavin in ways I think, some parents, don’t “get” their kids, because I know what it is like to shut down from sensory overload). I was hyper vaccinated in the Army and got 4 mercury amalgam fillings in one day during out processing and have lingering neuro damage from that. I have no doubt that I too, would be autistic if I was subjected to all that damage as a baby.
THERE is a genetic issue at play, but genetics are not causing autism. Genes load the gun, toxins pull the trigger.
If your baby is sickly, if your baby is rashy and allergic to most foods and formula with bad reflux, if your gut is telling you that their development is OFF… STOP VACCINATING!
For a while I did wonder if Gavin was a mix… a baby who was born with it to a degree and then damaged further by the MMR/DTP, since I did see an immediate regression with MMR and DTP. But when I sat down and took a mental inventory of all his medical problems along the timeline that included a birth dose of Hep B, and recalled his first day on this earth… a first day where he was healthy… I knew without a doubt that he was NOT BORN THIS WAY.
Please join the autism event Not Born With It and add your child’s photo!
EDIT TO ADD: I forgot to swear in this blog. FUCK!!!
